Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Rasner meets his maker

During the brief course of this blog's existence, I have spoke often of how The Curse of Aaron Small would likely consume poor Darrell Rasner in the end. Tonight, it did.

You see, once Rasner started the season 3-0, the New York media immediately likened him to to the journeyman Small, who improbably went 10-0 for the Yankees in 2005. That's a lot of pressure to put on a middling right-hander, and not surprisingly, Rasner went on to lose his next four starts.

But the Curse didn't get truly meta until tonight at PNC Park in Pittsburgh. That's because Aaron Small, the Aaron Small, a true ghost of Bombers past, visited the Yankees clubhouse to chat with old friends and presumably complete the destruction of Rasner's once-promising life.

You can guess what happened next. Rasner got pilfered by the Pirates, allowing seven runs on 10 hits over five miserable innings in a 12-5 Yankees loss. I can only picture Small perched high above the field cracking a crooked smile, striking a match across his stubble and lighting a Marlboro Red. Mission accomplished.

Meanwhile, the blood-thirsty media was already on the hunt for its next sacrifice. Well, if you count My9 as an actual media outlet. Here was Tuesday's "My9 Fan Blog Call To Action" poll, posted in the top of the fifth before Rasner's body was even cold.

"Do you think that Dan Giese can be the Yankees Aaron Small of 2008?"
Are you kidding me? Besides being grammatically incorrect, that's just wrong. Poor Dan Giese is a dead man walking and he doesn't even know it yet.

A spooky telecast included one last frightening bit of news, delivered in soul-destroying fashion by Michael Kay:
"I want to remind everybody that Wednesday night check out Flava Flav's hot new comedy, "Under One Roof". You've seen the real Flav, now he plays an ex-con who moves in with his rich brother and turns everyone's life upside down! "Under One Roof" every Wednesday at 8 on My9."
Chilling stuff in Pittsburgh tonight.

No comments: